The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
