I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize