I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
