Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
