The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
