Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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