Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Two words: blizzard sex
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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