If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
