you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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