this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
