Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
