I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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