Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Randomize