I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
