we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
