Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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