U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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