I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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