Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
