Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize