i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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