I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
