Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Randomize