I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
As shirtless as possible
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize