Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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