Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
