so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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