He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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