the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
