Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
