Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
