At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
