I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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