He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'm bleeding and have questions
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
