R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
It's official drugs can't kill me
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
