Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize