Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
