I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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