Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
