I'm lost and stupid without you.
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
