but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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