my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize