carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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