dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize