More tranny stories later!
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize
