So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
