So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Im just a social blackout drinker.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
