i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize