happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
