i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
