have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
