So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize